A New Legend in Town
They say magic still exists in small towns, and in Blythewood we’ve discovered our own local enchantment.
In my most recent article, I mentioned Santa Claus, Bigfoot, and the Lizard Man, mythical figures we know aren’t real but still enjoy believing in. So you can imagine my delight when, at a recent community forum, it was revealed that yet another legend has emerged right here in Blythewood: the elusive Sign Fairy.
Yes, the Sign Fairy, rumored to be the Tooth Fairy’s next door neighbor’s brother’s girlfriend, is said to be fluttering through Blythewood sprinkling civic twinkle dust that’s causing blue “Vote Yes” signs to pop up all over town like mushrooms after a summer’s rain. She’s apparently taken it upon herself to educate the public on the finer points of government reform all under cover of moonlight and plausible deniability.
Score one for special interests. Zero for transparency.
When Magic Meets Messaging
The signs may urge residents to “Vote Yes,” but the real question is: who’s paying to get you to say Yes?
As any seasoned journalist will tell you, when the trail gets murky, follow the money.
When asked at a recent public forum, Councilman Brock casually said he didn’t know. Councilwoman Fripp refrained from answering. Councilman McKenrick dismissed the inquiry altogether, calling it a “gotcha question.” Well yes, it is a gotcha question. Because it should absolutely catch your attention when elected officials claim they don’t know who’s funding campaign signage that perfectly aligns with the agenda their pushing.
Shrugs, Silence, and Side-Stepping
Blythewood is no longer just that small town people moved to for a quieter pace of life—when they want to escape the hustle, the headaches, and the high taxes of Columbia, but still stay close to the city. Those days are long gone.
With a multinational corporation now calling our town home, investors, developers, and outside interests are watching closely. Land is being bought up. Business deals are being scoped. People from far beyond our borders are eyeing Blythewood not for its charm, but for its opportunity. Economic growth always draws attention but not always the kind that serves the people who actually live here.
So when “Vote Yes” signs begin popping up across town like mushrooms after a summer rain, and every council member claims they don’t know who’s behind them, that’s not just suspicious. That’s reckless.
At a recent forum, Councilman Brock casually stated, “I don’t know.” Then later added, “It’s a private citizen.” But wait, if you don’t know who it is, how do you know it’s a private citizen? You can’t have it both ways. Either you know who’s behind this campaign, or you’re making excuses to cover for someone you don’t want the public to know about.
In a town that’s now on the radar of global players, that’s not just a contradiction; that’s dereliction of duty not to know who’s operating in your town.
Because what if it’s not a private citizen? What if it’s a foreign entity trying to influence local government? What if this “reform” is being pushed to create a system more favorable to outside developers or multinational deals, one with less voter control and more political insulation? That’s not a hypothetical. That’s a real risk.
And when your elected officials show zero interest, zero concern, and zero accountability, in finding out who is collaborating with them on their agenda, it sends a message loud and clear: they’re not watching the gate. Worse, they might be holding it open.
A Campaign Without Accountability
Because the campaign to bring about this so-called “more accountable” form of government has already shown zero transparency and zero accountability. No names. No financial disclosures. No concern from the very officials promoting it. And if this is how the campaign begins, imagine how the government will function once this form is adopted.
It’s a shadow movement. Quiet money. Quiet motives. Quiet agendas meant to weaken the voters, strengthen a few insiders, and usher in a system where no one takes responsibility and no one can be held accountable. That’s not reform, that’s a reengineering of democracy, designed to look harmless while it hollows out voter power.
And if you’re comfortable with that, if you’re still voting yes. Then boy, do I have a deal for you: some pristine oceanfront property just off Blythewood Road, with a stunning panoramic view of the Blythewood Mountains. Just five dollars an acre. Bitcoin only. Act fast.
What the Pixie Dust Is Really Hiding
So sure, if you’d rather believe in enchanted civic creatures working under moonlight, then go ahead and chalk this up to the Sign Fairy. Maybe she really is the Tooth Fairy’s next-door neighbor’s brother’s girlfriend. Maybe she really is fluttering through Blythewood with a backpack full of blue signs and a heart full of public service.
But more likely? The Sign Fairy isn’t spreading magic. She’s spreading money—quietly, strategically, and without accountability. And she probably doesn’t wear wings. She wears a suit. She sits in a boardroom. And her wand is a checkbook.
What’s most troubling isn’t just the mystery of the signs. It’s the complete indifference from the very people who are supposed to protect our democratic process. When elected officials shrug their shoulders and show no concern about who’s funding the agenda their pushing or who’s paying for the desired outcome. That’s not just disheartening. It’s dangerous. It signals to voters that they no longer matter. That this process isn’t about public trust. It’s about money, power, and personal agendas.
For Sale: Democracy, Slightly Used
So no, that’s not pixie dust you see floating over Blythewood—although it may seem magical. I wouldn’t breathe it in too deeply, because it’s actually smoke from special interests, and they’re blowing tons of it right up your ass. It’s all designed to put a bureaucratic puppet at the center of our town government—a puppet that will dance whenever the masters pull the strings. And this is all being coordinated by people you know, have trusted, and unfortunately, have given your vote to. Now, they’re trying to weaken yours.
And if you’re still voting “Yes” because you want to believe in fairy tales, well, I’ll throw in a pot of gold I stole from a leprechaun and a unicorn I wrangled off Boney Road along with that oceanfront property on Blythewood Road. Just five dollars an acre. Act fast!
